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Smiling mad, he's so happy

BoB and The (Near) Crashing Of The Escape Pod

BoB's escape pod materialized in the paradox again as he took off, and the control room spun. "I told you not to pull that lever," Celliri said. "Well it wuz too late den, huh?" BoB said, as there was a crash, and the control room shook. BoB was holding on to the control console, trying to reach the joystick. BoB managed to reach it, but because the control room spun, BoB lost his grip on it. "Danger! The whole control room will explode if you don't manually override in ten," Celliri said. The control room shook, and BoB lost his grip on the central column, and went flying through the air. 

BoB opened his eyes, and saw trees above him. He rolled over, and saw he had been lying on grass. He looked around, and noticed he was in a forest covered with fog. "Wut wuz BoB doing here?" BoB asked himself. "Let'z see... BoB wuz... hmmm. BoB came here... and uh... Scape pod piece! Dat it!" BoB said. "Let'z see... BoBz watch say ta go... north! Dat da way to go to find it den!" BoB said, and ran off. The further BoB ran, the thicker the fog got. Eventually, BoB heard a growl behind him, and turned around. The fog was too thick, and he couldn't see what it was.

"Iz anyone dare?" BoB asked. Suddenly, a tiger ran out of the fog at BoB. BoB jumped to one side, and ran off. BoB ran, and saw a vine leading up a tree. BoB climbed it, and hoped the tiger wouldn't find him. BoB jumped from tree to tree, until he saw a river up ahead. He got to the last tree, and swam across the river. "Ha ha ya stupid tiger! Catz don't like water!" BoB said. The tiger jumped in the water, and started swimming across. "Or wuz dat dogz..." BoB asked to himself, as he ran away. 

As BoB ran across the mountain, he came across a giant cliff. BoB ran along the edge of the cliff, and looked behind him. He saw the wolf that was chasing him catching up fast. BoB tripped over something as he was looking behind him. He looked, and saw it was an orange cat. "Hello, I'm a talking orange cat," said the cat. "Dat nice. Good fur you!" BoB said, and ran off again. After a while, BoB saw the cat again. "Wat do ya want from BoB, magic talking cat?" BoB asked. "I could chase off that wolf that's chasing you," said the magic talking cat. "Okay. Dat would be very nice, since BoB wuz running from it," BoB said, and the cat ran towards the wolf. Suddenly, the wolf disappeared.

"Tank ya very much, magic talkin cat! Now, BoB haz a scape pod piece to find," BoB said and walked away. "MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!" yelled the cat. BoB turned around. "Wat wrong with ya, magic talking cat?" BoB asked. Suddenly, the cat transformed into Donald Trump's wig, and started chasing BoB. "Bad magic transforming cat! BAD!" BoB yelled, and ran. "DEPORT!" screamed the psychotic Trump wig. "Aw, go build a wall around yourself, ya stupid thing!" BoB said. 

Up ahead, in the water, BoB saw his wooden fireman private call box, and ran across the beach towards it. "I hate Mexicans! I'm not racist!" screamed the Trump wig. "Iz ya a failed clone uv Trump or sumthin? Cuz dey got da racizim just right!" BoB said. BoB was  almost to his wooden escape pod, but suddenly it seemed like there was some force pulling him back. "You'll never leave unless you vote for me!" screamed the Trump wig. BoB ran with all his strength to his escape pod, and threw the double doors open. He ran inside, and shut the doors behind him, locking the Trump wig out.

BoB climbed the stairs to the control panel, and looked at the central column extending to the ceiling. "Wait a minute. Sumtin rong hear..." BoB said. "Let see... BoB wuz on da beatch...  and da wig wuz really a cat dat den turned into a wig, and BoB met it on a mountain... but BoB wuz on da mountain, den how'd BoB get to da beatch? And den dare wuz also a wolf... but wasn't it a tiger befour? And befour da mountain, BoB wuz in a jungle... But where wuz BoB before dat? How BoB get to all doze different places, without seeing dem befour? BoB didn't juzt teleport dare... wut wuz BoB doing in dat jungle? BoB got up, and den... BoB looked four a scape pod piece. But... wait a minute... wasn't BoB in BoB'z old scape pod now? And how dis interior back hear?" BoB said, and walked to the doors. He opened them, and saw that he was in his old escape pod. He closed them again, and started pacing.

"If only BoB could member wut happened befour da jungle! Befour dat... BoB wuz... BoB wuz... flying through the air... in... in... BOB'Z SCAPE POD!" BoB yelled. "And den... it wuz bout to explode... everythin wuz shakin... and den BoB went flying! BoB got it! BoB'z just knocked out right now! It all a dream! Dreamz don't ever make sense! Now... how can BoB wake up?" BoB asked, and opened the doors once again. He saw he was in some sort of larger space ship, where a couple of smaller ships were parked. Suddenly, he heard the sound of his escape pod materializing, a thousand times louder than ever. All around him, were thousands of copies of his old escape pod. "Maybe, if BoB find da right on, BoB will wake up?" BoB said. He walked around, looking for his new escape pod, made out of glass. Suddenly, he saw it. The one copy of his new escape pod, among thousands of the old ones. BoB threw the door open, and started to fall. He looked down, and saw he was falling from a cloud, in the shape of his escape pod.

"Well, maybe BoB will wake up from dis!" BoB said, as he fell. Suddenly, there was a wheezing noise next to him, and his escape pod was falling too. "Yes!" BoB yelled, as he grabbed the door and yanked it open. He looked inside, and saw it was the purple control room. As soon as he shut the door, everything started to spin, and there was a sudden shake. 

​BoB opened his eyes, and saw he was back in his control room, and it seemed to be falling apart. "Five..." counted Celliri. BoB saw the joystick laying right next to him, and grabbed it. "Four..." He pressed the button on top, and everything stopped spinning. The monitor turned on, and BoB saw outside they were about to fly into the side of the paradox. BoB tried to steer them away, but they flew through, and there was a wheezing sound as his escape pod materialized. "Good work BoB," Celliri said. "Tanks. How long wuz BoB asleep?" BoB asked. "Only five seconds," Celliri said. "Well, nobody can tell BoB BoB not a fast thinker... or dreamer... or watever ya'd call it," BoB said. 

They landed, and BoB opened the door. There was blackness all around BoB, but he seemed to be standing on a hard surface. He looked down, and saw a wall of his old escape pod at his feet. He picked it up, and hauled it inside his escape pod. "I'll deport you!" came a voice, and the Trump wig from his dream came into view. "Celliri, shut da door!" BoB yelled, and the door swung shut. "So Celliri, if we dematerialize now, we go back into da paradox, right?" BoB asked. "Yes," Said Celliri. "How can we scape dat paradox den?" BoB asked. "We have to just let the paradox keep carrying us, until we come out the other side, and are able to travel through time freely again. However, the paradox will probably take us to a couple of different places, so we'll have to take off a couple of times," said Celliri. "Well den, away we go!" BoB said, and pulled the lever.

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